When I was working full time I used to love Thursday as I felt I was just one day away from the weekend, one day away from a long lazy Saturday morning and not having to be up and ready for work. Now that DD is born the days in week don't seem to matter. Now my days are filled with a small person who depends totally on me. Washing what feels like miniature clothes and hanging them out in neat little rows. I do feel far more on top on things. Very rarely now is the house a complete disaster as I feel the need to keep myself busy while DD sleeps.
My day usually starts at about 6am when DD wakes and DH gives her the very needed bottle. DH then hands DD to me while I'm still in bed. I love this time. I love that DD has just spent quality time with her dad and then has special time with me. More often than not we both fall asleep. I usually wake again my 8am when I jump into the shower and get dressed and then get DD's bottles ready for the day. Anywhere between 9-10 DD wakes, we feed on the lounge and then have a chat to each other. I love the ever changing facial expression I get as this time. fresh from a decent sleep and a full belly DD seems to be the more content at this time. I then pick out an outfit for the day and we change and then it is floor time. I can still just sit and watch DD on the mat now kicking those legs like she is running somewhere and talking to the little people hanging off the arch bar and trying so hard to move and not quite sure why she can't roll over. At about 11 we are on the cot and so starts the sleep routine. Some days this is easy others it is so darn hard. Some days it is wrap dummy and bed and not a noise other days it is wrap dummy bed, dummy dropped and now back in, crying again, dummy has gone, dummy back in, settles with soothing shhhhh and hoping that this will be the last time the dummy drops out. This is the time I wash, clean, cook tidy, fold and generally run around like a fruit tune. By 4-5 DD is awake and once again feeding. DH is usually home form work around this time and has one on one time with DD. This gives me a chance for cooking dinner. We eat and then DD is bathed and starting the night time routine. Our night time still needs work. DD cluster feeds from about 7-11ish and then sleeps through to the next morning, this usually means that I fall into bed around 12am exhausted and thinking that yes while I feel drained I would not swap this for anything in the world I'm raising a life and this is the more demanding job in the world but it is also the most rewarding.
Wednesday, 14 December 2011
Monday, 28 November 2011
Were did 8 weeks go?
So this time 8 weeks ago I was getting ready to go into my OB and see if I was going to be induced or was going to wait a week. All of a sudden 8 weeks of passed and I have a bouncing little girl.
Let me backtrack a bit. My last OB visit ended in me having to go to hospital the next night and start the induction process. At this point I had no idea what I was in for. The induction started at 5pm that night. I was given the first dose of gel and was told that this should help move things along. After about half and hour I felt some small pains that felt like period pain. At 12pm I had the next round of gel which made the pains worse and more regular but then the hospital gave me some medication to sleep and that made the pains stop. If I had my time again I would have not taken the medication I think that slowed everything and may have contributed to the end factor.
At 6am I had to go to delivery suite. I had progressed enough that they could break my waters. I was so happy at this point. I then felt the need to have my mum with me. I called and she came in. Just before mum arrived they came in to put a drip in my arm. This was were I panicked. I hate needles any type of needles but for some reason this day I really didn't want the drip needle. Just as the doctor was about to d it my mum walked in and I burst into tears. I have never been so Happy to see my mum. My husband is wonderful but there is something about having a mum close by that makes everything feel better. After the drip was in the started the syntocine drip. Nobody tells you that you go from small mildish contractions to full on non stop no break contrations and they hurt. I lasted about 2 hours with no pain relief, after that I had the gas and I loved th gas. The gas has a very weird effect on you, you don't really feel the pain and it makes no forget what is happening but as soon as you stop breathing it you come back to reality. After another 2 hours the pain seemed to be getting worse and my mum called for the pethadine, which worked really well. All the time I had terrible pressure and I had no idea what to do. What I didn't know was that my baby had her head caught in my pelivs and could not get through. After 6 hours I was examine and found that she was caught and her head my being sucked through and was being damaged.
at this point it went from me feeling ok to emergency c-section. I was devestated, actually devestated dosen't even cut it. I had failed and big time. I wanted the natural birth I didn't want surgery. Why was this happeneing,
You can only have one person in the surgery and my husband came. I wanted mum as well but it couldn't be. Within minutes I was wheeled down and was being prepped to have the spinal block. another needle!!!!! The spinal block was actually ok and all of a sudden I was numb and was on my back about to have this baby. Within about 3 minutes my husband was brought in and 5 minutes after that our baby was born.
Our DD was taken over and was checked and had apgar scores of 8 and 9. Great scores. Her head was a little funny but stated to go down almost instantly. After I was stitched up I was taken to recovery and my daughter taken with her dad to be weighed and measured. I hated this bit I wanted to be with her the whole time. I don't think our health system think about the impact this has on mothers. Within an hour I was taken back to the room where I was able to finally hold this baby that I had carried for nine months. I could not believe she was finally here and that in an instant I became a mother and My husband and I became a family.
After 24 hours I had all the telltale signs of having a bladder infection and boy did I. That pain in more vivid than the labour. haha. Once this was treated I started to heal and recover. I can say now that a c-section is major surgery and not easy. It is hard work but the pain goes and within 5 days I was home and feeling better within a week of my dd birth I was out and about. within 2 weeks I was back to normal.
After the birth I had a lot of feelings of failure, that I could not do it and that "I" hadn't given birth to a baby. Someone had pulled a baby out of me and I felt very detached form the whole experience. I never felt detached form my DD but from how she came into the world. Through all of this I loved my mum so much. Mum is a trained counsellor and let me talk about the experience and let me cry and I really needed to cry. I also needed to say it was a crap experience and that it was not a normal experience.
The Hubby was amazing, from someone who had never held a baby he quickly found his rhythm and was great. Hubby changed the nappies and would wrap and attended to DD when I was unable. Within 2 weeks he went back to work and I slowed gained a routine to where I am today 8 weeks later.
VBAC but if not I know that within a week I will heal and it will be ok.
Let me backtrack a bit. My last OB visit ended in me having to go to hospital the next night and start the induction process. At this point I had no idea what I was in for. The induction started at 5pm that night. I was given the first dose of gel and was told that this should help move things along. After about half and hour I felt some small pains that felt like period pain. At 12pm I had the next round of gel which made the pains worse and more regular but then the hospital gave me some medication to sleep and that made the pains stop. If I had my time again I would have not taken the medication I think that slowed everything and may have contributed to the end factor.
At 6am I had to go to delivery suite. I had progressed enough that they could break my waters. I was so happy at this point. I then felt the need to have my mum with me. I called and she came in. Just before mum arrived they came in to put a drip in my arm. This was were I panicked. I hate needles any type of needles but for some reason this day I really didn't want the drip needle. Just as the doctor was about to d it my mum walked in and I burst into tears. I have never been so Happy to see my mum. My husband is wonderful but there is something about having a mum close by that makes everything feel better. After the drip was in the started the syntocine drip. Nobody tells you that you go from small mildish contractions to full on non stop no break contrations and they hurt. I lasted about 2 hours with no pain relief, after that I had the gas and I loved th gas. The gas has a very weird effect on you, you don't really feel the pain and it makes no forget what is happening but as soon as you stop breathing it you come back to reality. After another 2 hours the pain seemed to be getting worse and my mum called for the pethadine, which worked really well. All the time I had terrible pressure and I had no idea what to do. What I didn't know was that my baby had her head caught in my pelivs and could not get through. After 6 hours I was examine and found that she was caught and her head my being sucked through and was being damaged.
at this point it went from me feeling ok to emergency c-section. I was devestated, actually devestated dosen't even cut it. I had failed and big time. I wanted the natural birth I didn't want surgery. Why was this happeneing,
You can only have one person in the surgery and my husband came. I wanted mum as well but it couldn't be. Within minutes I was wheeled down and was being prepped to have the spinal block. another needle!!!!! The spinal block was actually ok and all of a sudden I was numb and was on my back about to have this baby. Within about 3 minutes my husband was brought in and 5 minutes after that our baby was born.
Our DD was taken over and was checked and had apgar scores of 8 and 9. Great scores. Her head was a little funny but stated to go down almost instantly. After I was stitched up I was taken to recovery and my daughter taken with her dad to be weighed and measured. I hated this bit I wanted to be with her the whole time. I don't think our health system think about the impact this has on mothers. Within an hour I was taken back to the room where I was able to finally hold this baby that I had carried for nine months. I could not believe she was finally here and that in an instant I became a mother and My husband and I became a family.
After 24 hours I had all the telltale signs of having a bladder infection and boy did I. That pain in more vivid than the labour. haha. Once this was treated I started to heal and recover. I can say now that a c-section is major surgery and not easy. It is hard work but the pain goes and within 5 days I was home and feeling better within a week of my dd birth I was out and about. within 2 weeks I was back to normal.
After the birth I had a lot of feelings of failure, that I could not do it and that "I" hadn't given birth to a baby. Someone had pulled a baby out of me and I felt very detached form the whole experience. I never felt detached form my DD but from how she came into the world. Through all of this I loved my mum so much. Mum is a trained counsellor and let me talk about the experience and let me cry and I really needed to cry. I also needed to say it was a crap experience and that it was not a normal experience.
The Hubby was amazing, from someone who had never held a baby he quickly found his rhythm and was great. Hubby changed the nappies and would wrap and attended to DD when I was unable. Within 2 weeks he went back to work and I slowed gained a routine to where I am today 8 weeks later.
VBAC but if not I know that within a week I will heal and it will be ok.
Thursday, 26 May 2011
Kung Fu Panda
We went back for our 19 week OB's app yesterday, and everything is great. My hubby and I have nicknamed the baby Kung Fu Panda and it never stops moving.
I had a long talk to my OB yesterday about getting this baby out. My ideal is a normal natural birth. However more and more I am seeing people having c sections. This is really a worst case for me. I really want the better recovery time of a natural birth. My fear though with a natural birth is a tear or being cut. I have had so many friends say that you can't even tell if either of these things have happened. I know I still have like 20 weeks and I shouldn't panick but I think it is the whole idea of the unkown.
We are so excited as in 11 days we can find out what we are having. I really want to be able to call this baby by name. Also the OCD person in me wants that baby's room to be painted and ready before the baby arrives.
I had a long talk to my OB yesterday about getting this baby out. My ideal is a normal natural birth. However more and more I am seeing people having c sections. This is really a worst case for me. I really want the better recovery time of a natural birth. My fear though with a natural birth is a tear or being cut. I have had so many friends say that you can't even tell if either of these things have happened. I know I still have like 20 weeks and I shouldn't panick but I think it is the whole idea of the unkown.
We are so excited as in 11 days we can find out what we are having. I really want to be able to call this baby by name. Also the OCD person in me wants that baby's room to be painted and ready before the baby arrives.
Monday, 23 May 2011
Days like this
What a day. Sometimes I feel like if I could skip today and go straight to the next day I would feel better. I think at times being pregnant it seems that you are not as in control of your emotions as what you were before. I found it hard today when confronted with a difficult situation.
Part or should I say most of my job is making people happy. I turn grumpy unhappy customers into happy little vegimites. At times I would like to love to tell me how I really feel when they ask the very common question of "How are you today". My typical response is "Great". Today I really felt like saying, well I have been up since 6am on my bathroom floor with the bucket beside me. I can't find any really comfory clothes, my hair looks like someone had put it on hormones, my skin is terrible and to top it off, I really don't think I can slove your problem today. But the proffesional person in me tells me to keep with the "great" answer.
In all of this I still find it quite amazing that my little babe growing everyday is blissfully unaware of what is happening around him/her. I love reading the interesting facts about what is happening each week. Very excited as on wednesday I have my next app. with my OB. Hopefully this will give me another chance to see this little babe.
Until next time...
Part or should I say most of my job is making people happy. I turn grumpy unhappy customers into happy little vegimites. At times I would like to love to tell me how I really feel when they ask the very common question of "How are you today". My typical response is "Great". Today I really felt like saying, well I have been up since 6am on my bathroom floor with the bucket beside me. I can't find any really comfory clothes, my hair looks like someone had put it on hormones, my skin is terrible and to top it off, I really don't think I can slove your problem today. But the proffesional person in me tells me to keep with the "great" answer.
In all of this I still find it quite amazing that my little babe growing everyday is blissfully unaware of what is happening around him/her. I love reading the interesting facts about what is happening each week. Very excited as on wednesday I have my next app. with my OB. Hopefully this will give me another chance to see this little babe.
Until next time...
Sunday, 22 May 2011
Week 18 and still living with a bucket beside me.
I will never forget the feeling of seeing 2 pink lines on a pregnancy test. The idea that in less than 9 months I would be holding a tiny little person in my arms and that I would be the one person who would have to feed, change, clothe, bath and provide that tiny person with all of there needs. However that feeling for me turned into one of a sick feeling. Little did I know that this sick feeling was the begining of my dreaded morning sickness.
It all started in the week 6 and up till 18 we are still living with the bucket everyday. I do have to stay that if one more person gives me advice on how to overcome it, I may want to put my 2 cents in and it may not be so nice.
I can say that I have tried every possible cure. Ginger tablets, eating dry crackers, lots of water, lots of fresh fruit and veg, soda water, laying in bed for a while after breakfast and many others. I have found that brushing the teeth makes the problem worse.
In all of this it dose still give me a slight bit of peace knowing that a sick preggo mother usally means a healthy babe. We can say that we have an active babe.
I know that this is my first blog and I am having a whinge but this is also a way of putting down info that I may forget in the coming months. I also promise that it won't always be negative.
It all started in the week 6 and up till 18 we are still living with the bucket everyday. I do have to stay that if one more person gives me advice on how to overcome it, I may want to put my 2 cents in and it may not be so nice.
I can say that I have tried every possible cure. Ginger tablets, eating dry crackers, lots of water, lots of fresh fruit and veg, soda water, laying in bed for a while after breakfast and many others. I have found that brushing the teeth makes the problem worse.
In all of this it dose still give me a slight bit of peace knowing that a sick preggo mother usally means a healthy babe. We can say that we have an active babe.
I know that this is my first blog and I am having a whinge but this is also a way of putting down info that I may forget in the coming months. I also promise that it won't always be negative.
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